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THE POWER OF FATHER-DAUGHTER MEMORIES
YOUR TURN
Go find her and create a memory. Don't overthink it. Do it today. Keep it small. Someday Rachel will forget the day I took her to Duncan Donuts. Someday she will forget the flowers and chocolate I took her at school. She will not forget how she felt when she got them. A $1 donut and a little bit of time.
And don't forget to take a picture with you in it. It will be a treasure for her one day.
If you have a tradition, keep it going. If you don't, start one. Mine is taking my daughters to a Christian dude ranch every summer, 18 weeks of horses and good times. So far. What will yours be? A letter Every Sunday, a picture every birthday, every summer, every year, every day, something she can count on. Be the kind of dad that will take her to the same corner for a picture once a year. Memories for a lifetime.
And no, you will not always get it right. But as long as you keep trying, that’s what she will remember. Never give up. Why is this so important? Because if you show her that she’s worthy in good and hard times, what do you think she will expect from the men in her life? What kind of woman will she be in the world? You have so many opportunities to show her how she deserves to be treated.
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It won't always be easy, there will be difficult times (hint: the teen years), but it will always be worth it. Let her know the love never stops, and the relationship is more important than being right. Show her how to say sorry if you make a mistake. Help her learn from hers.
And it's never too late. If your relationship with your daughter is not what you want it to be, it's not too late. If your relationship with her is terrible, it's not too late. Start now, start small. Be patient. My friend and author Sandra Chaney wrote in her endorsement of this project, "My dad and I did not have a very good relationship. Towards the end of his illness, he gave me a huge gift in the form of a letter in which he shared his love and admiration for me. It is a memory I still cherish till this day.... It's never too late! I know".
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I'm asking every man to join The Every Sunday Project. Challenge your friends and brothers and every man you know with a daughter to step up and be an extraordinary part of her life. The suffering in our teen community needs to stop. It's time for bold action and outrageous leadership dad. Be part of the solution. Join the project.
I'm speaking to the women too. I hope you will coach and support your partner in his efforts to build a deeper bond with your daughter. You had a dad. Tell him about that relationship. Tell him what meant the most, tell him what hurt. Tell him what you really needed.
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It's been a three-year journey since I found Elizabeth on the floor of her bathroom that morning. She's better now. She still has struggles, but she's better. We talk about important things now, the real stories. When I say it won't always be easy, I lived that. Every parent has lived that. When I say it will always be worth it, I mean it. The love never stops.
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Think about your daughter. If someone someday asks, "What is your best memory of your dad"... what will she say? Are you giving her something to say? Are you creating those memories that will last a lifetime?
The best answers I got to this question always started with a smile. Give her lot of options dad, too many to remember. Write to me on this site and tell me about a memory you created. Reach out, it's why I' here.
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But remember this: it's how you show up as a man and as a dad every day that matters the most. For great dads, EVERY DAY IS A SUNDAY.
THE POWER OF FATHER-DAUGHTER MEMORIES
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CREATING MEMORIES
WITH YOUR DAUGHTER
How do you create memories with your daughter? Where do you start? Here’s a hint: start small. I have two words for you: Dunkin and donuts. It’s not complicated. Here’s another hint: It’s not the donut. If you have a tradition, keep it going. If you don’t, start one. A letter every Sunday, a picture every birthday. Something every summer, every year, every day. Something she can count on. That is more important than the thing itself.
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DEPOSITS IN THE MEMORY BANK
Over the years, I’ve asked many women to share memories of their fathers. Here are some of my favorites.
Airport Hero
“It was the end of our family vacation. I was five years old. We turned in the rental car and were headed through the terminal to the gate. I realized I’d left my doll in the rental car. My mom said, ‘Don’t worry, we’ll get a new one when we get home.’ But my dad scooped me up in his arms. We ran back through the terminal, got on the shuttle bus, and returned to the rental car place...