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THE EVERY SUNDAY PROJECT
What if every girl got the dad she deserves?
WHAT WOULD THAT WORLD BE LIKE?
When my daughters look back on their lives, what will they remember? What stories will they tell, and what role did I play in them? If someone asks them to name their best memories with their dad someday, what will they say? Will they say they felt safe, loved, and cared for by me? Will they talk about things we did together, or the kind of man I was? How did our time together shape the women they became? Think about those questions for yourself. In the meantime, I want to tell you a story.
EXTRAORDINARY DADS AND GOOD MEN
The Every Sunday Project is inspired by the life of Frank Dearborn, a father who built an extraordinary relationship with his daughter. When Donna left for college, Frank told her he would write her a letter, every Sunday. She promised to write back, and for 32 years they wrote those letters. Every. Sunday.
One day, Frank had a stroke and could no longer write or express his thoughts. Donna visited him in the nursing home and told him stories to cheer him up. Stories about her life as a girl growing up with Frank. She wrote them down and those stories became a book: “Every Sunday: A Father and Daughter’s Enduring Connection.” It is a true love story, the story of a girl who got the dad she deserved.
The world needs more good men and more good dads. Men like Frank Dearborn - men with inspiring stories of devotion to their families and their daughters. Strong men who use their strength for good. Men who will stand in the storm of the teen years and not back away. Men who live so that she knows, no matter what, he will be there. The love never stops.
To read more stories about Extraordinary Dads, click "continue reading." Or to read about the importance of masculinity and what it means to be a good man in the world, do the same thing.
ABOUT BOB BELKNAP
Father, Founder of The Every Sunday Project, Coach, Public Speaker
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What if every girl got the dad she deserves? What would that world look like? I would like to have that conversation with you.
In 2001 a baby girl named Elizabeth was born in Texas. She didn’t have a safe place to live, so five days later she was placed in a foster home, Janice’s and my home in Houston. Two years later, Elizabeth’s sister, Rachel, was born in the same situation - and ended up in the same place, united with her sister.
Opening our home to these two girls transformed my life and inspired me to make a big change. I decided to not only adopt Elizabeth and Rachel, but to also end my corporate career to pursue a new one: full-time Dad.
THE POWER OF
FATHER-DAUGHTER MEMORIES
If you’re a dad, what does your daughter need from you? If you’re a daughter, what did you need from your dad? Answering this question became a passion of mine, partly because Elizabeth, Rachel, and I have been navigating this conversation in our own lives for so long. I know we are not alone.
What does a daughter need from her dad? To get an idea, I started asking adult women a simple question: What is your best memory of your dad?
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I can spot a woman who had a great dad the moment I ask the question. I can see it in her face before she says a word and in her sparkling eyes that sometimes tear up at the memories. I can also spot a woman who didn't have a great dad. Different face, different tears. She’s searching for a memory that isn’t there or hoping to forget some that are. She will spend the rest of her life wondering about what might have been if she had a different dad. Or one that showed up.
THE TEEN YEARS
One day you are going to see her somewhere and it’s going to hit you: she isn't your little girl anymore. It will surprise you – when did that happen? Hips, breasts, hormones, moods. The teen years, the best years of parenting. Said no parent ever.
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Studies show that Dads start to withdraw from daughters in these years. The relationship becomes awkward. Your daughter can feel like the embodiment of that swirling jar of numbered balls at a bingo game. A random ball comes out – N2 sweet little girl, B3 – sulking girl, G16 – mature thoughtful girl. You never know. One morning my youngest came down the stairs, and I said, “Really cute outfit.”
“So what you’re saying is I’m fat!?” she cried.
Huh? It can be like that but don’t lose heart. This is normal…your new normal. And though it might not always seem like it she needs you more than ever.
SERVICES
Inspired by The Every Sunday Project and what it can mean for not only your family, but others close to you? Not only do I want to hear from you, but I also want to help. Spreading the word about the power of exceptional father-daughter relationships is my mission. That may come in the form of speaking to large or small groups, coaching individuals on where to start this journey, or other kinds of coaching including leadership coaching.
I’m even more interested in your stories: Men, reach out and tell me about the memories and traditions you are creating with your daughters. Women, tell me about your best memories with your dads. I want to hear from you. It all starts with a conversation.
TESTIMONIALS
I was blessed with an amazing dad. No matter how busy he was, my dad always made time to listen—fully present—often guiding me through the process of arriving at the solution myself. Every Sunday I was the lucky recipient of a weekly letter and reminder—“you are loved.” My dad’s faithfulness and boundless love undoubtedly laid the foundation for me to feel loved, confident, positive, and worthy for the rest of my life. I commend Bob Belknap for pursuing this project—such an important, relevant, crucial one!
Donna Dearborn, author of “Every Sunday: A Father and Daughter’s Enduring Connection"